Travel Diary: Day #9 (New York)
It’s a choice between sleep and breakfast, and I go with sleep. I’m sorry for writing about sleep so much; it’s just that it has become very important to me. I have realized that if I don’t sleep, I don’t do the things I need to on this tour well—things like talking to people. So a lot of my time is spent considering when I will sleep, and where, and for how long.
I’m met at my hotel by Rachel, who is my publicist at Doubleday. Rachel has been working for months at getting me reviewed, interviewed, and hosted all over the country: basically she organizes everything, then I just turn up and take all the glory. She is terrific, and great company as we are driven around Manhattan in one of those tinted-window town cars. (It’s all tinted-window town cars here; that and cabs and stretch limos.) I ask her why there was no Chicago stop on this tour (which people keep asking me about), and she tells me it’s because everyone at Doubleday hates Chicago. Okay, no, not really. It’s actually something to do with the difficulty of booking enough media to justify the stopover. Which I think is fair enough, given the publisher is paying for all this. But I do let her know that if I don’t get any Midwest stopovers on my next tour, people may hurt me.
First stop is WNYC radio. I’ve done enough radio interviews on this tour to be quite comfortable about it, but here the corridor I have to walk down to reach the sound booth is lined with posters of various celebrities with the tag line, “I’m a listener.” I suddenly find myself confronted with the unnerving image of Sarah Jessica Parker reclining at home with the radio on, thinking, “Who is this Australian jerk?”
Despite that distraction, the interview goes well and then it’s off for a round of bookstore drop-ins. These are becoming defined for me by the big titles currently out, especially Stephen King’s Cell, which is front and center in practically every store I’ve visited. I hope that one day some struggling midlist writer on book tour looks at enormous piles of my books and thinks enviously, “That damn Max Barry! His new book is everywhere.”
One of the bookstores I visit is St. Mark’s, which I realize is the first store in which I ever saw a copy of my own book. Let me tell you, this is one of the most magical moments of becoming a published author. I’ll never forget seeing Syrup sitting on the shelves, as if it was a real book. Of course, if St. Mark’s held true to the general trend, they probably never sold that copy. It was probably returned to the publisher and pulped. But still. Magical, I tell you.
Next is a Barnes & Noble, and it’s memory lane again because it’s across from a park where I once played with some squirrels. I know, I know: to Americans—or, indeed, to residents of any country where there are squirrels—they are nasty little disease bags. But I think they’re wonderful. I love the way they spring from place to place. I could watch that for hours. In fact, I have, and taken photos.
When I swipe my hotel card to get back into my room, it flashes red at me. I go back to the lobby and get a new card, and, when this produces no change, get security up to fix it. The security guy tries the card, and it flashes red… and he turns the handle, and it opens. Oh. I just assumed that red meant no go. Because this is a nice hotel, the security guy says carefully, “I guess it must have started working again.”
I catch a cab to my reading and realize why there is so much honking of car horns in New York: it’s all because of this one cabbie. He drives with one hand resting on the horn, tooting everyone, even if they’re not doing anything special. He pre-emptively toots people he thinks might be considering something. And if someone dares to toot back, he goes nuts, firing off loud volleys of counter-toots.
My reading is at Rocky Sullivan’s, a pub, and it’s a full room even when I arrive. Before we start, I decide to go around and hand out the publisher-provided donuts, and I can see some people trying to figure out if I am really me. Some clearly assume I’m not, but rather just some wacko handing out donuts, then get embarrassed when they find out.
It’s a very fun reading, and knowing it’s my last one makes it a little poignant, too. I manage to read the sentence “Elizabeth’s throat thickens” without messing up for the first time on tour. At last! It’s a little victory.
Then, all of a sudden, it’s over. I catch the subway back to my hotel, get a little lost, and now here I am. As much as I’m looking forward to getting home, I’m also kind of sad this is over. When I had the idea to do this travel diary, I honestly thought I’d be writing about the completely unglamorous job of trekking from city to city, visiting uninterested bookstores, and hoping desperately for more than five people to turn up to a reading. Instead it has been wildly more successful than I imagined. I can still hardly believe how rock star the whole thing has become.
Thanks so much to everyone who turned out in L.A., Mountain View, Seattle, Portland, and New York. You made this tour unforgettable for me.
Tomorrow I go home.
Comments
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Nathan (#4)
Location: Seattle - USA
Quote: ""I have a fictional novel." Sure you do, make sure you call it that to an agent!"
Posted: 6651 days ago
Adam A. (#256)
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Quote: "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." -George Carlin"
Posted: 6651 days ago
Dave (#29)
Location: Seattle
Posted: 6651 days ago
Your squirrel episode reminds me of the Japanese student we hosted who absolutely HAD to have a picture of a squirrel. She told us they have them in zoos in Japan. Crazy. Mindless little rodents.
Brad Lee (#1964)
Location: Lubbock, Texas, U.S.A.
Quote: "Everyone dies at some point, why not go on your own terms, at your own discretion. Naked covered in syrup. Yeah."
Posted: 6651 days ago
Tim Ashwood (#595)
Location: Sydney
Posted: 6651 days ago
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/lopate/episodes/02012006
Phill Sacre (#1822)
Location: London, UK
Quote: "Computers are like air conditioners. Both stop working, if you open windows."
Posted: 6651 days ago
*ahem* I'm glad to hear that the book tour has gone well and that you're getting the recognition you deserve :-) When are you going to do a tour in England?
SilverCloud (#2038)
Location: SANTA MONICA ,CA.U.S.A.
Quote: "Fortune Favors the Brave"
Posted: 6651 days ago
Congrats on your successful tour....
Next tour you need to get on TV, The best book seller is Don Imus Show,T.V. MSNBC EST 6am-9am....WFAN Radio 6am-10am..NYC
Kalle (#1278)
Quote: "Sex is herital. If your parents never had it, chanses are you'll never have it either."
Posted: 6651 days ago
Daniel Rose (#1367)
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posted: 6651 days ago
Next you need to tour Australia, and get me an advance copy of Company because it's too expensive to import.
Keely (#1602)
Location: easy-peasy-24.livejournal.com of course!
Quote: "I always wanted to see the lights of Broadway... but then you get there and they're really kind of annoying."
Posted: 6651 days ago
I was the girl with the funky jacket. I think I was the youngest one there. No, I was /definitely/ the youngest one there. That was awesome, thanks!
Annie (#1941)
Location: Florida
Quote: "I'll take my chances"
Posted: 6651 days ago
annie
Djoules (#1553)
Location: Paris, France
Quote: "yes... maybe."
Posted: 6651 days ago
Best of luck to Company, i can't wait to put my hand on it (and maybe read it too).
Cheers !
talk less. say more. (#1942)
Location: tampa, florida
Quote: "talk less. say more."
Posted: 6651 days ago
best,
kathleen
shabooty (#637)
Location: D.C./V.A/M.D.
Quote: "I will shake your foundation. I will shake the f**cking rafters. Nobody'll be the same -Danny Bonaduce ....& go visit my blog @: http://www.shabooty.com"
Posted: 6650 days ago
:0
Flynn (#520)
Location: Chicago, IL USA
Quote: "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
Posted: 6650 days ago
Squirrels *are* cool. Have you seen any black ones yet? I've been meaning to look up why they sit in the trees and scream all the time. Maybe the ones around here are insane.
Mike Sarzo (#517)
Posted: 6650 days ago
J/K. I bet you'll both be relieved to go back home and disappointed your revels on tour have ended. I've seen enough stuff about rock tours to get the drift. ;)
Rob (#2135)
Location: Manchvegas
Quote: "I can't think of anything good to say"
Posted: 6650 days ago
Unfortunatly, NY was too out of my way to make it to. How about Boston next trip?
Great book by the way. Your best one yet!!!!
Andrew Riley (#1970)
Location: Parker, Colorado, USA
Quote: "Predictions are difficult, especially about the future."
Posted: 6650 days ago
Congratulations on the tour Max. If you'd been a little closer to Phoenix I'd have driven to a signing.
Great book. Write many many more!
Kristen (#1157)
Location: Jersey
Quote: "Insert quotation here."
Posted: 6650 days ago
David (#1456)
Location: Sydney, Australia
Quote: "Why are the pretty ones always insane?"
Posted: 6650 days ago
So don't mind us tourists as we gaze contentedly at squirrels in the park, the only creatures anything like them we have back home are undoubtably both nocturnal and highly endangered.
I've greatly enjoyed your travel diary Max, have a great trip home and when you do a local tour please bring (fresh) donuts!
Chris (#2156)
Location: Melbourne, Aus
Quote: "somebody said something once. i can't remember what it was."
Posted: 6650 days ago
P.S. Kristen #1157 - we stop the dingoes from taking our babies by feeding them dismembered homeless people. the government pay us with generous incentives.
Adam (#24)
Location: Morristown, Indiana
Quote: "Why do I blog? Simple, because Max Barry blogs."
Posted: 6650 days ago
NON-TRAVEL DIARY DAY 9(WE MAY HURT YOU, MAX BARRY!)
If you do not stop in Chicago on your next book tour, bricks will be electronically thrown through your computer. Anyways, Congratulations on a great/semi-complete tour success(next time it could be more complete if it features Chicago). I still hope to meet you in person, someday...
Speaking of talking about sleep, I just finished a 2 and 1/2 hour nap. This nap felt good at the time that I was taking it, but now I know that it is part of a slippery slope of offsetting my sleeping pattern. I will not be able to fall asleep until 2-3am tonight, and then I will arise at 7am in order to go to school. When I get home from school tomorrow, I will be so tired that I need to take another nap(which will make it so I can't sleep again until 2-3am). This doesn't effect some people, but me, it will taking me a few days to get back to a normal sleeping schedule.
-adam
PS I just learned that the plural of Dingo is spelled Dingoes with an "e". thanks chris!
mike (#1842)
Location: Houston
Quote: "It is okay to cry over spilled milk, if you really hate cleaning.."
Posted: 6650 days ago
And some of us who are regularly denied the correct amount of sleep understand the sleep obssession (ssss) but than again it allows me to ponder the meaning of life... or maybe I will just take a nap
John (#194)
Location: Los Angeles
Quote: "You understand the meaning of the word "foreboding?""
Posted: 6649 days ago
check this link -- very COMPANY-esque:
http://www.defamer.com/hollywood/paramount/things-to-do-at-paramount-when-youre-dead-152699.php
Shivaun (#50)
Location: melbourne
Quote: "we must go to the party in order to drink a lot and dance with girls"
Posted: 6649 days ago
Now, when is the Australian book/rock star tour going to start? No pressure, or anything.
Rod McBride (#688)
Location: Gardner, KS
Quote: "www.MidwestRockLobster.blogspot.com"
Posted: 6647 days ago
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