MaxBarry.com
if you were him you'd be home now
Lexicon

News

Tue 09
Jul
2013

The Future, with Librarians and Lipstick

Lexicon You know what I discovered on book tour: AMERICA HAS GONE TO THE FUTURE. I was there two years ago but in the meantime America advanced about a decade. Now you use your phone to carry boarding passes and movie tickets. When you need a ride somewhere, you summon cars with an app. I tried to buy a sandwich in New York and the store didn’t take cash. DIDN’T TAKE CASH. I met two people who don’t carry wallets any more, just credit cards. In two more years, I guess, they will just carry phones.

Max Barry speaking at a podium at Barnes and Noble, New York Now I’m home in Melbourne, Australia, I’m all, “Ugghhh, stores that only take cash, how 2011.” I just bought some sushi and it seemed really stupid, handing over a twenty and trusting the cashier to remember and figure out the right change. That process is fraught with potential errors. If we didn’t already do it like that, and somebody invented it, it would seem like a terrible idea.

Besides marveling at technological process, I was in the States to read and sign books. During my New York event, a person asked, “What’s the worst thing about being an author?” At first, I was overwhelmed by things to bitch about, like, just that morning, I had really felt like some wheat-based cereal, but my fancy hotel restaurant only did Granola. This is the kind of rough justice I’m expected to put up with on book tour.

But beyond that, there was the whole thing about having a career that occasionally seems like it’s about to dissolve into nothingness, which is sporadically terrifying, and sometimes I write things nobody likes, which is disappointing, and working on the same idea for years at a time can be challenging, too.

Like, fifty copies of Lexicon, and pens to sign them with I didn’t catalog these pains, though, because they were hard to justify in the face of a room full of people who had all come out to see me and buy my books so I could keep writing stories for a living. That is just plain awesome. I think I’m getting more appreciative in my old age, by which I mean less deluded about how rare and special this is, getting to write books and have them published and people liking them. Thank you so much to everyone who reads my stuff, and comes to see me, and tells other people my books exist.

Speaking of which! I don’t know how you politely slip into conversation that you’ve received a crapload of positive reviews, but CHECK THIS OUT: a crapload of positive Lexicon reviews! You have to admit, that’s a lot. Even I feel like buying a copy after reading that.

Lots of copies of Lexicon on display at Better Read Than Dead, 256 King St, Newtown NSW, Australia If you have bought a copy, and now you have questions, you might want to join the @Penguinusa Twitter Book Club and tweet questions at me. The first session is Tuesday 7pm EST (US).

Another thing I’m doing is fielding outrage from librarians. At the end of Lexicon are Acknowledgments, which contain this:

And, hey. You. Thanks for being the kind of person who likes to pick up a book. That’s a genuinely great thing. I met a librarian recently who said she doesn’t read because books are her job, and when she goes home, she just wants to switch off. I think we can agree that that’s as creepy as hell. Thank you for seeking out stories, the kind that take place in your brain.

This sparked some amount of LIBRARIAN RAGE, expressed via email and Twitter. In retrospect, I should have seen coming, because I am married to a librarian and know how they work. See, librarians come in two flavors: Kick-Ass Librarians and Mundane Librarians. Kick-Ass Librarians love books with a deep and fiery passion, and have firm opinions about censorship, and will cross burning coals and defeat ravenous lions in order to deliver an age-appropriate book into the hands of a willing reader. Mundane Librarians—of which there are very few, compared to Kick-Ass Librarians—just do the job. To them, books are rectangular things that need to be scanned and filed. When I say it like that, it doesn’t sound so bad. But to Kick-Ass Librarians, a Mundane Librarian is a new mother in a Birthing Ward who says, “Yeah, I just had a baby. He’s around here somewhere.” It tears at the insides of Kick-Ass Librarians that these people are entrusted with the care of books (and readers!). And it burns them up to think that people believe all librarians are like that: Mundane.

So I am sorry for not being clearer about that, Kick-Ass Librarians.

Many copies of Lexicon at Pages and Pages Booksellers, 878 Military Rd, Mosman Junction NSW, Australia Finally! Are you Australian? Do you want to win a copy of Lexicon? Do you sometimes lie awake, regretting things you did in high school? If you answered YES to at least two of these questions, and they were the first two, post a comment here on maxbarry.com plaintively begging and/or arguing the merits of your case! The Australian publisher is kindly letting me give away five copies. Entries close Friday 5pm!

Also! I just saw a minute ago that Syrup is opening in Canada this weekend in Toronto and Calgary! That is literally all I know. I know this seems like an incredibly stealthy way to release a movie, not telling anyone where it’s playing, but that’s because you don’t understand marketing, and apparently neither do I. OH WAIT I just sleuthed out some info: Friday in Toronto at Carlton Cinemas. You can even win free tickets.

And that reminds me! Sorry, I have to mention this, too. While I was in the US, I managed to collect two movie souvenirs. One is a can of Fukk, which by rights belongs to Mat Coad, because he won a competition to design a Fukk can on this site six years ago. The other is the book “Lipstick Lesbians… And Why Men LOVE Them! (A Girl’s Guide to Giving Straight Guys a Hard Time),” which Scat discovers in 6’s apartment:

Screenshot from the movie Syrup, with Scat, played by Shiloh Fernandez,
pulling down a book entitled Lipstick Lesbians

As it turns out, the designer of this prop, whose name I’m going to put here as soon as I discover it, not only did an amazing job creating this work of art, but also embedded jokes on the rear side:

Front CoverRear Cover

Which I just think is awesome. Also, apparently he used The Scarlett Pimpernel as a template.

Max drinks from a can of Fukk

Tue 04
Jun
2013

On Tour

Lexicon “Tour” may be an exaggeration. I’m going to a few places. If you want to see me, come along, and I’ll be all like, “Thanks for coming,” and you can be like, “That’s cool, man, no problem.”

Columbus, OHChicago, ILNew York, NYLos Angeles, CAMelbourne, Australia

Columbus, Ohio

Saturday June 15, 7:00pm ***UPDATED***

Gateway Film Center 8

Film screening! Syrup is playing here and I’ll be doing a Q&A afterward about what it’s like to have a book turn into a movie. I land in Columbus on the night of the 14th direct from Australia so I can’t make any guarantees about how I’ll smell. Because of the long flight, I mean. Not because of Australia. Australia smells fine.

By the way, Syrup is simultaneously screening not too far away at the Waterfront Film Festival in South Haven, Michigan, with a Q&A with the director Aram Rappaport and editor Robert Hoffman. If you think those guys are better.

Update! They decided it was a bad idea to schedule a Q&A that could be derailed by me missing a connecting flight. Is that a mixed metaphor? Because I’m saying the Q&A sesssion would be derailed, not my flight. Anyway, the Friday evening session is now a Saturday evening session, and I will be able to shower and degrease ahead of it.

Chicago, Illinois

Sunday June 16, 4pm ***UPDATED***

Hang With Max @ Emporium Arcade Bar

I’ll be in Chicago two days before my book comes out. I can’t do a bookstore event, but I figured I could meet people at a bar or something. I did this in London once and didn’t get stabbed at all so I think it’s a good idea. There might be some Syrup film people there too. So you could come along and talk about books and films or whatever. Very casual. If you bring a book, I will sign it.

Details to come: I will update this post. And if you know a good venue, please let me know in the comments.

Update! At the moment it’s looking like this will be in Wicker Park. But please check back for confirmation.

Update 2! Let’s make it the Emporium Arcade Bar, 1366 N Milwaukee Ave. Chicago. Thanks to Mark Dunlap for the suggestion. If it sucks, we know who to blame.

All good book stores, US & Canada

Tuesday June 18

Book comes out. I mention this because you probably want to schedule some time to head to your local bookstore and elbow aside the crowds.

New York, NY

Wednesday June 19, 7:00pm

Barnes & Noble (Upper East Side)
86th & Lexington Ave.
Ph. 212-369-2180

Book launch! I will read from Lexicon and answer questions and stuff. You know. It’s a reading. Actually, it’s more of a talking. I talk about things. I figure you can read the book yourself. I mean, that’s why we had it printed. I will read for a little while, because that’s expected, and because sometimes people come to bookstore readings for no particular reason and hear some of the book and think, “That sounds good.” Then they buy it and I get to continue being an author.

Los Angeles, CA

Thursday June 20, 7:00pm-8:00pm sharp ***UPDATED***

Mysterious Galaxy Bookstore (Redondo Beach)
2810 Artesia Blvd., Redondo Beach

Bookstore event! I read, I answer questions, I sign things. I haven’t been to Mysterious Galaxy before, but it was LA Weekly’s Best Geek Bookstore of 2012. So that’s promising. I only have a few hours in LA, flying in that day and flying out that night, so this will be the kind of visit that’s brief and passionate and leaves both of us wanting more, like that time in high school.

Update! I need to RUSH from this event to LAX to catch my flight home to Australia. So at 8pm I need to be out the door. I’m sure there will be time to sign everyone’s books, but I won’t get to hang around and chat. What I’ll do is get there early, like maybe 6:30pm, and browse the shelves or something. So if you want, come up and accost me.

All good book stores, UK

Thursday June 20

Book comes out in the UK. Sadly, I don’t get to be there. My in-laws moved out of Bedford, did I mention? They did. I will probably never go to Bedford again in my life. What am I saying, probably. There is no way I am ever going to Bedford again.

Melbourne, Australia

Tuesday June 25, 6:30pm

Embiggen Books
197-203 Little Lonsdale Street

Australian launch! On the day of Lexicon’s Australian / New Zealand / South African release I’ll be launching it here. Embiggen is awesome. They stock about ten books but they’re all really good. They stock more than ten books. That was an exaggeration. But you could seriously just wander into Embiggen with your eyes closed and buy whatever your hands fall on and walk out happy. It’s that kind of place.

By the way, the following day (Wednesday June 26 @ 6:30pm) the Embiggen Book Club is doing Machine Man. Details here!

Other Places

You know I’d come if I could. It’s not you; it’s me. Me, not being near you.