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Page 33.
Machine Man (serial)

It was five weeks before I heard from Lola Banks. I tried to call her, many times. But the hospital was not an authorized number, so I had to ask reception to connect me, and whenever they did, it rang out. I began to suspect that reception was being deliberately obstructive. Finally I jury-rigged a packet-disguised VoIP connection from my workstation, and sure enough, when I did that, the hospital switch answered right away.

“Charlie!” said Lola. She sounded robotic, because my computer was untangling her audio from a data stream that otherwise looked like a really long joke email. But there was unmistakable delight in her voice, and I felt relief. It had been a month and she hadn’t called me; I’d started thinking I must have kissed her the wrong way, or she’d changed her mind, or something. I don’t know. “I’ve been calling and calling!”

“You have?”

“Yes! They always tell me you’re busy and I have to leave a message.”

“Oh,” I said. “That’s weird.”

“And I called your home, but your answering machine filled up. Are you screening?”

“No. I just haven’t been home.”

“Since when?”

I had to think about this. “March.”

There was silence. “I think you need to get out of there, Charlie.”

“Why?” I went to scratch my cheek and missed. I looked at my hand. I wasn’t wearing my index finger, that was why.

“I just think it would be a good idea.”

“Well… okay.”

“I’m going to give you an address,” Lola said, and I reached for a pen, with the hand that had fingers.

33.

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Machine Man subscriber Ian Manka (#3916)

Location: Los Angeles, California (school) | Akron, Ohio (home)
Quote: "Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance."
Posted: 6242 days ago

Hmm... five weeks since the last page that featured Lola, or five weeks since Charlie lopped off his arm/hand?

I like the time warp here. Was the time warp because everyone in the comments knew where Charlie would end up?

This page sorta reminds me of the reverse engineers portrayed in "Paycheck." They get in a vault, get locked inside, no contact with outside world for a few weeks. Is it Charlie's or Better Future's choice for him to stay there, I wonder?

Machine Man subscriber Mapuche (#1184)

Location: Darwin, Australia
Quote: "Inconceivable!"
Posted: 6242 days ago

Love it!

Machine Man subscriber Yannick (#3858)

Location: Heist, Belgium
Quote: "he reads things"
Posted: 6242 days ago

is it me or is the story progressing awfully fast?
page 33 and he's already missing more than half his limbs!

it this goes on at this speed for about 200 pages, it'll be one heck of a book!

Machine Man subscriber Max

Location: Melbourne, Australia
Quote: "I'm my number one fan!"
Posted: 6242 days ago

Although looking at it another way, you've been reading for six weeks. That's kinda slow.

Machine Man subscriber Adam (#24)

Location: Morristown, Indiana
Quote: "Why do I blog? Simple, because Max Barry blogs."
Posted: 6242 days ago

I wonder if anyone else is doing weird experiments on themselves or other people to make some sort of nemesis for Charlie. It's only page 33 and his limbs are going fast. I feel like he's going to have to use his machine manly-ness to fight someone. Is this a super hero book in diguise? There's already a girl he could potentially save from evil-doers.

-adam

Machine Man subscriber FerretWithASpork (#2218)

Location: NY, USA
Quote: "What the F**ks a terminal?"
Posted: 6242 days ago

Did I miss a day? Where did his fingers go?! Is he just.... continuing to chop off seemingly non-essential body parts?! GAH! I love this story! :P

Vanessa Woods (#3725)

Location: Ontario, Canada
Quote: "An optimist sees the glass as half full. A pessimist sees the glass as half empty. A realist knows the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. "
Posted: 6242 days ago

Ahahaha, this is brilliant. Loving it!

Michael (#3884)

Location: Here
Quote: "Wait, what?"
Posted: 6242 days ago

Sure, her voice sounded robotic because of *his* computer. Nicely done, Mr, Barry. Nicely done.

Lola isn't the one he'll be saving (if it does go superhero, which I'm not sold on), she'll be the one he's fighting!

Machine Man subscriber Toby O (#2900)

Location: Sydney
Quote: "vote with your wallet"
Posted: 6242 days ago

One of the best things about writing, and this really shows it, the author can decide the pacing of events, whether to pass over a chunk of time (i.e. the reader will fill in the gaps just fine) or to delve into a chunk of time, where minutes could span pages, for whatever reason.

I'm guessing now that we've established Charlie's crash course towards machine limbs, we can hurry and get him suited up ready for the villain.

Machine Man subscriber Roger (#1653)

Posted: 6242 days ago

Whoa. I had to go back and make sure I didn't miss any pages. Way to mess with our minds, Max!

Machine Man subscriber Joe M. (#3183)

Location: Texas
Quote: "Grooviness is essential"
Posted: 6242 days ago

hahahaha! That was a great horror-movie moment.

Drunkendove (#2064)

Location: Neither here nor there.
Quote: "An altogether admirable attempt at alliteration, and although ample accidental additions are assured, all are accessory."
Posted: 6242 days ago

I'm really starting to dig this book. Not that I didn't at the start, but I decided not to state it in case you screwed it up and the I'd be in the aweful position of having already declared my love for a screwed up project. Not that I thought you would screw it up, but I was just watching all the angles. I mean, if you look at it, you're either going to screw it up, or you're not going to, so there's easily a fifty per cent chance that you're going to screw up, and with such odds I needed to be covered, right?

...I'm starting to think I haven't accomplished what I wanted to accomplish with this comment which was to say much love, ectera ectera. Yarr?

Drunkendove (#2064)

Location: Neither here nor there.
Quote: "An altogether admirable attempt at alliteration, and although ample accidental additions are assured, all are accessory."
Posted: 6242 days ago

"aweful". Ugh. Karma can be a bitch.

Machine Man subscriber Justin (#3965)

Location: USA
Quote: "It has been my experience that certain men get ahead during the time that others waste. - Henry Ford"
Posted: 6242 days ago

It doesn't sound like he's lost his arm - just his fingers . . .

Friendimpaired (#3721)

Location: Richmond, VA
Quote: ""I've found that I have a wacky irrational fear of flamethrowers. I know, I know. Weird, huh?""
Posted: 6242 days ago

*jaw drops*

Love the nonchalance here about the fingers.

Machine Man subscriber C Leffelman (#3968)

Location: IL
Quote: "You can only be young once. But you can always be immature. - Dave Barry "
Posted: 6242 days ago

I think its even better that he doesn't even flinch when he realizes that he's trying to use a hand without fingers. My question though, is that don't you think that you would want to design at least your legs while you still had your fingers?

Machine Man subscriber gstein42 (#585)

Location: 127.0.0.1
Quote: "That's not change! That's more of the same!"
Posted: 6242 days ago

@Ian:
did we predict the further amputations, or did Max read our predictions and run with them?

Abgrund (#3357)

Location: Atlantis
Quote: ""Redeem your mind from the hockshops of authority." - Ayn Rand"
Posted: 6242 days ago

"Wasn't wearing" his index finger, like he chopped it off as casually as taking off a glove. And he doesn't see anything wrong with it, doesn't get why other people are squicked. Charlie scares me.

It's a little like Iron Man, except that 1. Charlie isn't satisfied with sissy half-measures like a suit and 2. He's a much more believable character. Disturbingly so.

Machine Man subscriber David (#1456)

Location: Sydney, Australia
Quote: "Why are the pretty ones always insane?"
Posted: 6242 days ago

Lovin' it still! Interesting that Max doesn't specify which hand is missing the index finger, maybe it just sounded casually creepier without such specifics? Perhaps one of the advantages to replacing one's limbs with mechanicals is you're no longer right or left handed?

Of course, one day soon Charlie's going to get to a "limb" most men wouldn't even consider amputating under *any* circumstances, I wonder what he's going to do then? I get the impression Charlie isn't all that keen (or experienced anyway) in activities that involve that part of the body (he's coming across as an autistic/Aspergers type for sure), I suspect that's going to become a pivot point very soon...

Machine Man subscriber Max

Location: Melbourne, Australia
Quote: "I'm my number one fan!"
Posted: 6242 days ago

I love these comments.

Ike Diggety (#1952)

Location: Florida
Quote: """
Posted: 6241 days ago

a little off-putting, but in a way that left me blaming only myself. a parabola is what it is. to soften it would only be insulting. i just hope we have more than ten pages left.

fervently.

Machine Man subscriber Ian Manka (#3916)

Location: Los Angeles, California (school) | Akron, Ohio (home)
Quote: "Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance."
Posted: 6241 days ago

@gStein: Maybe that's what I meant.

@Abgrund: I assumed that Charlie has already lopped off the arm that he was using to make the motion of scratching his face with. For instance:

One of my younger brothers had a toy that is essentially a mechanical hand (can't find a picture, but here's the patent: http://www.google.com/patents?vid=USPAT5286228) and I remember that the plastic "fingers" would pop off from time to time, leaving the base of the "finger," but not the actual "finger" itself. It was difficult to re-attach the "fingers" after they had been separated, so oftentimes my brother would play with only the three "fingers."

My guess is that Charlie doesn't need his fingers all the time, so why put them in all the time?

P.S. I have no idea how I remembered the above story, nor do I know why someone would patent and sell a "toy mechanical hand." Also, when typed in succession, the spelling "finger" starts to look weird.

Machine Man subscriber Stygian Emperor (#2947)

Location: the Stygian Empire
Quote: "Flesh is a design flaw."
Posted: 6241 days ago

He oughtta make his cybernetic limbs more comfortable when they're attached if he's taking them off all the time.

Now does this new hand just only have two or three heavy-duty fingers like a robotic claw, or is he just not wearing all of them at the moment? He could also have multiple hands for different needs.

Machine Man subscriber Yannick (#3858)

Location: Heist, Belgium
Quote: "he reads things"
Posted: 6241 days ago

Screw fingers, suction cups is where it's at!

Machine Man subscriber Justin (#3965)

Location: USA
Quote: "It has been my experience that certain men get ahead during the time that others waste. - Henry Ford"
Posted: 6241 days ago

His whole leg wasn't cut of if I remember correctly. Just from below the knee and down.

Why would he just get rid of some fingers and not his whole arm, Max? Surely a robotic arm would be stronger.

Also, Charlie would need a frame to go around his torso to anchor his super strong arms to; so, maybe we'll get to see a little "super suit" as well.

Machine Man subscriber H.G.Wells (#2282)

Location: Portland, Oregon
Quote: "If you are flamable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg"
Posted: 6241 days ago

For the finger thing, I totally got the impression that it was like the "mechanical toy hand" as well, with the whole arm and/or hand having attachable fingers.

P.S. Love it so far!

Abgrund (#3357)

Location: Atlantis
Quote: ""Redeem your mind from the hockshops of authority." - Ayn Rand"
Posted: 6241 days ago

A frame around his torso? Really, what purpose does all the junk in the torso serve? It's nothing but a power supply for the limbs, the head, and one other appendage. It's superfluous now, or soon will be.

Machine Man subscriber Yannick (#3858)

Location: Heist, Belgium
Quote: "he reads things"
Posted: 6240 days ago

@Justin:
His leg was cut off from above the knee!
source: page 6

Machine Man subscriber Justin (#3965)

Location: USA
Quote: "It has been my experience that certain men get ahead during the time that others waste. - Henry Ford"
Posted: 6240 days ago

My mistake. Good, a whole robotic leg is better.

If Max got rid of all of his "organic" body, we would no longer try to sympathize with him; we would just see him as a robot. There is something to our anatomy which makes us "human;" besides, no woman wants a robot. Who is he going to go for Max? Lola or the hot lawyer?

Charlie couldn't be autistic or have any sort of handicap; he's designing legs powered by nuclear fusion, or fission, or whatever. :-)

Having said that, he isn't going to get rid of his manhood. :-)

Machine Man subscriber Alan W (#1427)

Location: Spokane, Washington
Quote: "Corgis are like potato chips"
Posted: 6239 days ago

I have been wondering about the pacing, does only realing/writing a page a day make Max want to put more in each, or rather, make more happen each installment?

It has seemed fairly well paced for a page a day, what will it be like to read the whole book in a few hours?

I am really enjoying the latency between pages, it forces/allows me to take some time and consider all the details and subtleties of each installment.

Brilliant. Thanks again Max!

Machine Man subscriber fred (#3690)

Quote: "well thats weird. i was under the impression that you were incredably stupid."
Posted: 6238 days ago

@Justin

nah, the arms won't necessaryly be heavier then regular ones. if he's got mini reactors, than i'm sure he can manage a light and strong alloy.

Machine Man subscriber Jussi (#4452)

Location: Helsinki, Finland
Posted: 6102 days ago

I am a bit late reading the book, but loving it so far. "...and I reached for a pen, with the hand that had fingers." Hilarious! And I love the page-by-page email concept. The highlight of my day, really.

Thank You, Mr. Barry!

stanley becker (#5283)

Location: black hole
Quote: "DON"T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER!!"
Posted: 5528 days ago

If you think of Philip K. Dick's "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" you realize that the human brain must eventually be supplanted by an artificial control center which would have it's own intellectual and emotional set-up - it is obvious [to me anyhow] that this will be the successor to our flawed existence and the superiority of these bio-machines goes without saying - it's a no-brainer [pun] and at some point Charlie [if he desires immortality] will have to self-lobotomize in order to open up to the next generation of brain ........somewhere in my dark recesses I remember the quote "I have seen the Future and the Future is us" .............I don't think so!?!

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