Machine Man (serial)

I don’t want to sound weird, but don’t you think there is something seriously wrong with people? I mean, there is, obviously: you hear these terrible stories where the father just snaps, and you know that guy was broken. Something happened in his head, some leakage, and what spilled out was beyond comprehension. Everyone agrees on this. They ask if you heard about that man and those poor boys, and say, You just can’t understand it, can you?

It’s the look they give you then that bothers me. I am not a great reader of people, so at first I thought I was misinterpreting. But now I don’t think so. Can you? I think it’s a real question. And when you shake your head and say, No, it’s unbelievable, they are trying to figure out what you really think.

I have two theories. The first is they suspect you, too, may be broken: that your brain contains fissures. That, under the right circumstances, or the wrong ones, you might do something unbearable. They want to know if they ought to take precautions.

The second is they think they might. And what they’re looking for is a sign they’re not alone. Because sometimes, when they’re humiliated by their boss or the baby won’t stop howling, the red thoughts that burst inside their brain, they’re really horrific.

I don’t blame anyone. It’s not a personal failing, in my opinion, to feel violent when your brain floods with vasopressin. That’s just what happens. You drop a glass, it falls toward the Earth; maybe that’s not the outcome you want, but don’t blame the glass. Don’t pass moral judgment because cause produced effect. Because stimulus provoked response. That’s how it works.

Still, I am disturbed by the idea that I’m surrounded by polite, smiling men and women one serotonin dip away from savagery. I’m not saying it’s anyone’s fault. I’m just saying I think that situation can be improved.

32.