But I do have some excellent news on the new book. If you’ve been dying to know what’s next, you should check this out right now.
A couple of months ago, my brilliant literary agent, Todd Keithley, decided to quit the industry. I don’t want to start any nasty rumors, but if you said that a beautiful girl lured him to Baltimore with a siren song of seduction, I wouldn’t correct you. Todd helped me to a flying start as an author, so it was a tough job to replace him. For one thing, he used to let me crash at his apartment any time I needed a place in New York and eat all his food, and it’s hard to find another agent who will do that.
My new agent is Luke Janklow, of Janklow & Nesbit. This means I can deliver my long-awaited next book (I keep telling you people, it’s coming) to my publisher. How this process works is I send my editor a copy, and once she’s distracted by it, Luke grabs her, flips her upside down, and shakes her until all the change in her pockets fall out. We grab the money (which is called an “advance”) and split. The process for selling film rights is very similar except you have to say “babe” more often.
I got a look at a Syrup screenplay recently, which was pretty exciting. (There’s nothing like getting a big package from a Hollywood studio to start the day; there really isn’t.) The new name is Soda, but that’s about all I can say without getting myself into contractual trouble. Ha ha! (I’m serious. These guys have good lawyers.)
Yes, it’s finally happened: Syrup has been optioned for a feature film! After a great deal of messing around (mostly by me), today I finally signed a contract. This means I now get to sit around and say things like, “Tobey Maguire can win a thousand Oscars, babe, but he’ll never open a picture,” while other people go about the dirty business of actually trying to get something made. It’s fun already.
As things start to happen in the coming months, I’ll report it here. And if nothing’s happening, I’ll make up some wild rumors to keep things interesting.