Machine Man

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Page 1.
Machine Man (serial)
CHAPTER ONE

One Tuesday afternoon my left leg was severed. It wasn’t as bad as it sounds. Well, it was. It was agonizing. There was a lot of screaming and flopping around and trying to tear my shirt into pieces to stem the bleeding. While I was busy with this, my co-workers stared through two-inch polycarbonate security glass and beat on the door. They couldn’t get in. It was sealed for their safety. I had to apply my own tourniquet and try not to pass out for eight minutes. While I lay there, waiting for the time-release, I could see the top of what used to be my leg poking out from between two thick slabs of steel, gently dripping blood to the floor. I felt sorry for it. My leg hadn’t asked for this. It had been a good leg. A faithful leg. And now look at it.

But in the weeks afterward, as I lay in my hospital bed, I came to see the bright side. I remembered that expression: A setback is just an opportunity in disguise. I decided that was true. Because while I was sad to lose my leg, now I could build a better one.

1.

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Comments

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Rene (#2458)

Location: Austria
Quote: "To live is to die - Cliff Burton"
Posted: 5723 days ago

[Quote]My leg hadn’t asked for this. It had been a good leg. A faithful leg. And now look at it.[/quote]

I tell you, that sentence could have been out of Tony Hawks's "'Round Ireland With A Fridge", if you replace "leg" with "fridge"...

Machine Man subscriber Jeff (#787)

Location: Berlin, Deutschland
Quote: "Give a man a match and he'll stay warm for the rest of the day; Set a man on fire and he'll stay warm for the rest of his life."
Posted: 5723 days ago

Very good start! I'm already hooked.

Yenzo (#829)

Location: Secret underwater pyramid base in the Pacific
Quote: "In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe (Carl Sagan)"
Posted: 5711 days ago

Dismemberment in the first frickin sentence. This is gonna be good. Feels a bit like Kafka's The Trial, for no particular reason.

Machine Man subscriber Xpovos (#958)

Location: Washington D.C.
Quote: "Time not important, only life important"
Posted: 5710 days ago

Maybe it's just because I've watched and re-read Watchmen recently but the terrible accident behind the timelock door feels a little cliche'd.

Thomas (#1221)

Location: Germany
Quote: "One more, and I'm going to consider you my penpal."
Posted: 5710 days ago

Also, it's just the right length to work in this format, I think. I can sneakily read it while working, and still pretend I don't know any bald people from Australia, should I be pressed about it.

Jeffers0n (#3865)

Location: Maryland, USA
Posted: 5710 days ago

Seems like a great start to me, makes me want to read the next page.

DomPody (#3867)

Location: DC
Posted: 5710 days ago

No idea how excited this has made me, I've been missing your writings. Good luck :)

Machine Man subscriber Toby O (#2900)

Location: Sydney
Quote: "vote with your wallet"
Posted: 5710 days ago

The phantom itching started approx day 20

David (#3868)

Location: NJ
Posted: 5710 days ago

I've missed your writing style and am very excited to follow along on this journey!

David (#3868)

Location: NJ
Posted: 5710 days ago

oh - and Happy Birthday!

Machine Man subscriber Eddie Hilton (#184)

Location: Rochester, NY
Posted: 5709 days ago

Happy Birthday! And I cannot wait to see where this goes!

Machine Man subscriber Joe M. (#3183)

Location: Texas
Quote: "Grooviness is essential"
Posted: 5709 days ago

Hm. The unreliable narrator is a wonderful device, but I'm not certain that's what we have here. The shallow irony of the style certainly seems appropriate to the medium, at least.

Machine Man subscriber David (#1456)

Location: Sydney, Australia
Quote: "Why are the pretty ones always insane?"
Posted: 5709 days ago

When you said it was going to start on the 18th you failed to mention that was US time, i.e. the 19th here in the more chronologically advanced regions of the world. All day yesterday forlornly checking my RSS feed wondering if Max had suddenly chickened out or gone on a bender. Finally, a day late, to receive a two paragraph "page", a mere teaser, the literary equivalent of a pilot episode that got cut off by a power failure. You are a cruel, cruel man.

Machine Man subscriber Paul Haggerty (#3189)

Location: Bloomington
Quote: "Does the sky look orange to you as well?"
Posted: 5709 days ago

well, so far i like what i see, and i'm excited to see what there is to come

Machine Man subscriber Katie Ellert (#207)

Location: Calgary AB Canada
Quote: "Where's Lola? WHERE'S LOLA?!?!"
Posted: 5709 days ago

I want to keep reading.
:(



(also, happy birthday)

Jared Squared (#3446)

Location: Boulder, CO
Quote: ""Never turned my back on society, society turned its back on me.""
Posted: 5708 days ago

I don't know why other people think this is cliche in any way? Unless they are just visualizing what they know....ie. what images the media has implanted in them. Knowing your past sado-masochistic exploits, (John Nike was sadistic, Scat was so masochistic; the biggest glutton for punishment) I would say this character severed his leg on purpose. There is no real sign of an accident after all. It seems the protagonist has planned this carefully. It also seems that he didn't want anyone stopping him. It also seems that I have written more words in this comment than Max has on his first page.

Machine Man subscriber Julie Totsch (#1341)

Location: Racine, WI
Quote: ""The world is full of willing people, some willing to work, the rest willing to let them." - Robert Frost"
Posted: 5561 days ago

The description of losing the left leg has made my right leg start hurting. My left leg seems strangely not to care.

Machine Man subscriber Geoffrey Atkins (#858)

Location: Omaha, NE
Quote: "these nights are already long. and if i last through the winter. i swear to you now i won't call. --Circa Survive"
Posted: 5561 days ago

I'm totally psyched about this. I look forward to continuing!

Sara Allred (#4423)

Location: Paris, Texas
Quote: ""the only difference between a mad man and me is I am not mad" "
Posted: 5541 days ago

"I felt sorry for it. My leg hadn’t asked for this. It had been a good leg. A faithful leg. And now look at it." This is my favorite line. I am new to your writing but I LOVE your humor, it is brilliant!

Machine Man subscriber Lucano (#5307)

Location: Brazil
Quote: "I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying."
Posted: 4974 days ago

Very good start! I hope the other pages are just as good...

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