Machine Man
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Page 2.
Machine Man (serial)

As a boy, I wanted to be a train. I didn’t realize this was unusual—that other kids played with trains, not as them. They enjoyed the management. Constructing tracks and having trains not fall off them. Smashing them into things. I didn’t understand that. What I liked about playing trains was pretending my body was two hundred tons of unstoppable steel. A precisely tuned engine of pistons and valves moving at a hundred miles per hour.

“You mean robots,” said my best friend Jeremy. “You want to play robots.” He was right. Trains were just the closest thing I knew.

2.

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Comments

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Thomas (#1221)

Location: Germany
Quote: "One more, and I'm going to consider you my penpal."
Posted: 5488 days ago

I hope that Eric, Enemy of Trains, will make an appearance. I'm so giddy!

Dan Hope (#3822)

Location: Wordsley, UK
Posted: 5488 days ago

Wow! Two pages in, and I'm already feeling this story. (Always had a robot obsession myself, to be honest. I was always the murderous robot trying to kill the humans. I was 8. I made realistic robot noises.)

Argh! But now, another 24 whole hours to wait. Murderous! Scandal!

*rocks quietly to and fro in the corner, mumbling incoherently.*

Machine Man subscriber tim (#3234)

Location: chattanooga, TN, USA
Quote: """
Posted: 5487 days ago

Whoah now... don't overwhem us with content here.. I can't drink from a fire hose! :) A paragraph and a half is like wetting the lips of a man dying from thirst. Words! We need more words!!!
As a devoted fan who picked up Syrup in '98 which ignited my passion for product marketing (I actually worked @ Coke for a while), I say this is a great start and the format will make me savor the pages.
I do hope you're not going to start charging incremental fees as our addiction grabs hold; though I'd probably pay it.
Keep it up!

Machine Man subscriber Yannick (#3858)

Location: Heist, Belgium
Quote: "he reads things"
Posted: 5487 days ago

> I actually worked @ Coke for a while

oh I see what you did there :)

AlteraX (#1984)

Location: Portugal
Quote: "My 62 year-old dad is reading Jen Gov. He's an Economist. - 2005"
Posted: 5487 days ago

I want more and I want it now! Or else...

'Cause I know you have more stuff already written somewhere and you're holding back...

And one can find all sorts of information just floating around on the interwebs...

Argh, it's pointless, I can't intimidate Max! He stares down trademark layers with his lazy(-er) eye...

So I'll just beg:

*kneels and clasps hands*

Can I haz more words, pls?

*grovel, grovel*

Jeffers0n (#3865)

Location: Maryland, USA
Posted: 5487 days ago

Good paragraph and a half, but you would have to print that pretty large to fill a page.

Mark (#2176)

Location: Ohio, USA
Posted: 5487 days ago

Blood, gore, extreme pain- a great start

Alexander (#2328)

Location: Maine
Quote: "He who fights monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster, and it you gaze into an abyss for long, the abyss gazes also into you - Friedrich Nietzsche"
Posted: 5487 days ago

More! Moar!

By the way, I used to have a friend who wanted to be a lightbulb when she grew up.

Machine Man subscriber Xpovos (#958)

Location: Washington D.C.
Quote: "Time not important, only life important"
Posted: 5487 days ago

Much better! I like.

Machine Man subscriber Toby O (#2900)

Location: Sydney
Quote: "vote with your wallet"
Posted: 5487 days ago

Am I allowed to comment on each one? 2 for 2 isn't bad, right? Like 30/30 would be stalker but maybe 12/30 would be just normal engaged reader, right? I would prefer to do 6/15ths of a comment each time, but comments seem to only occur in whole, non-negative integer form.

In case no one has said it yet STEAMPUNK!

Lora (#3425)

Location: UK
Posted: 5487 days ago

I love you, Max Barry.

Jared Squared (#3446)

Location: Boulder, CO
Quote: ""Never turned my back on society, society turned its back on me.""
Posted: 5487 days ago

Judging by everyone's comments thusfar, you are the sadist. I think your anti-format is encouraging. Who tells whom how to write a book?

I always enjoy an unnamed narrator, helps to relate better to the story. Deus ex machina. And literarily speaking, you've already painted our hero into a corner. What next indeed?

Machine Man subscriber Alan W (#1427)

Location: Spokane, Washington
Quote: "Corgis are like potato chips"
Posted: 5487 days ago

Second page, first typo!

" ... a two hundred miles ... "

May have an extra 'a' there. =)

Great start! If the whole book is this good, I'll be totally addicted.

Machine Man subscriber Max

Location: Melbourne, Australia
Quote: "I'm my number one fan!"
Posted: 5487 days ago

> Second page, first typo!

DAMMIT!

I have to leave it there. That was the deal. Must... not... edit...

(Thanks everyone for your amazing comments! Happy Max.)

Machine Man subscriber Max

Location: Melbourne, Australia
Quote: "I'm my number one fan!"
Posted: 5459 days ago

Screw it, I'm correcting typos from now on. They bug me too much.

Celeste (#2590)

Location: St.L. MO, USA
Quote: "You can't child-proof the world, so world-proof the child."
Posted: 5405 days ago

Well. You've got me now, havent you? So far I've skated by, you know, started with NationStates, subscribed to your blog, checked out Jennifer Government from the library. (They didnt have Syrup and Company). But then we rediscovered NationStates. My son and I both tried out MachineMan. I received the last free page, and now I am not even receiving your blogs anymore. (Or maybe you are too busy writing MachineMan).

Next pay period I have to pay for this. And my son will be hounding me to read my e-mail over my shoulder. On the other hand, that means he'll actually seek me out to speak to me every day.

And I ought to bug that new bookstore to carry your books.

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